So now you are happily planning the rest of your life, and I am paralysed in mine. Your sister has provided you with a job, a salary and the freedom to do as you wish, and I am stuck in a job with an egotistical manic, telling me how best to portray him, as if he is truly something! He is a  control freak, but he’s enough to make me hate my job so much I can’t (couldn’t) get out of bed this morning. I just couldn’t deal with him, my staff, the nerves, the disappointment … you.

I can’t see a way to change my life, I’m looking, but I can’t. I still need to keep the house here for the children and us, I need to pay the mortgage, there are bills, my salary covers all this – so I can’t see a way out. I suddenly understand feeling ‘trapped by the rat race.’ For once I don’t feel hopeful or carefree about the future, I don’t see the blue sky anymore, and if I do, it’s too hot to venture into it.

Can I really blame all this on you?

I’m so capable and strong, what’s happened to me? Is it my age? I did change jobs because I was so ambitious and I got this one, ‘Manager’ – recognised for my own skills and knowledge, at last – but now I’m not sure I want it? But now how do I get out?

I want to do something different with my life, I still want to be recognised for my own talents, but just mine, not part of a large organisation – but how? What? I’ve seen the disaster that you’ve made of trying to run your own business – would I really be any better?